I've waited until I've been home a couple of days, returned to work and "life as usual" to allow myself to fully reflect on my experience while in Moldova. I myself have been lost in a smile more than once remembering the antics of some of our team members and some of the situations we all found ourselves in. Big Serdj...I miss your assertive driving and have almost gone "Moldovan" with my driving a couple of times in the last few days....but today, Thursday....3 days after returning home the real purpose of why I went...why I think we all went came crashing in on me...I went because God wanted me to....not because He needed me to. I, like I'm sure all of our team members, have had my share of pats on the back for going to the "mission field". I really don't deserve that. I didn't do anything. I responded to God's urging to go and unbeknownst to me and maybe others that responded, that was all I was asked to do. God didn't "send" me to Moldova for all that I could do for Him. He asked me to go so that I could learn who He really is and how much He cares for me. You see, I can do nothing for orphans or people who are lost but God can do everything. God allowed me to come in contact with these children, these people of Moldova, not so I could change them but for the express purpose of changing me. I felt compassion for them and experienced true pain at the plight of some of these unfortunate souls I encountered. God intended that to show me how unfortunate I am without Him. I am no more capable of pleasing God on my own than some of these children were capable of feeding themselves.
God showed me how helpless I am without Him. He didn't need me to go to Moldova. He can take care of His own all by himself, through whatever means He chooses. He wanted me and the rest of the team to go for the purpose of conditioning our hearts to understand that we were all orphans, we were all handicapped, we were all discarded...until Jesus revealed Himself to us and we realized we belonged to Him. God doesn't need your talents, your gifts, your efforts....but He wants them...and He will use them for His great glory and He will teach you that total dependence on Him is the only thing you need to concern yourself with. Thank God he wanted me and these precious others to go and as a result He taught all of us how much He loves us.
I'll forget some of the details of this adventure over time but regardless I'll never be the same; and you can be sure I'll never forget that I went to Moldova because He wanted me to....May God Bless you and I pray you'll go where he wants you to.